Yes, boys and girls, you heard it here first! The rest station on the space station is open for bidness again, according to News Daily – where the reporters work for their salt.
The International Space Throne – sometimes known as Ol’ Butt Sucker – is fully functional again after astronauts installed the new pull-chain and floaty thing in the Russian-designed piece of – ahem – crap. Renewing the depleted blue Sani-flush sanitizer bulb will have to wait until next mission, but astronauts are thrilled that that they no longer have to store their end product in their shirt- and pants-pockets. Chief astronaut Festus Coypu simply remarked, “I’m relieved.”
The sole female astronaut was heard to exclaim, “@#$%^& – you son’s o’ bitches! I’ll shove &*()^@*%^ and give it a good ^&% up your %#$# !! You fucking numbnut dipshits!”
I have to admit, she has a point.
Here is some smut.
And here is Last Of The Few’s … Um, … whatever!
June 7, 2008 at 4:13 am
Actually the one thing taht I have heard nothing about is where the in fact DID store their “material” during this time. Little zip lock baggies, perhaps? Some unsuspecting astronaut’s boot?
June 7, 2008 at 8:00 am
I thought they blew it out into space. I wonder if they take pooper scoopers out for space walks?
June 7, 2008 at 8:40 am
I always call dog-turds on the lawn (or anywhere else) “meteorites”. Now I know for sure: They come from space!
June 7, 2008 at 10:05 am
I remember reading that the toilet was partial working, so the problem was only with, errh, liquid, and not with solid.
June 7, 2008 at 11:00 am
I vaguely recall it was the suck-fan or something like that – necessary for the fluids like you said, but not for the solids.
But I can’t depend on my memory so much nowadays, and I often read (and retain, dammit!) contradictory information.
June 7, 2008 at 11:40 am
but not for the solids
Why? Do they shit higher density bricks in space? Or I guess turds are easier to catch.
June 7, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Just so, PnB. I believe that long tube is a suction hose for the guys. Can’t swear to it, though. But I can tell you this: guys are no better aims in space than they are on the ground. And – yes – if a guy takes a whiz in free-fall, he goes in the opposite direction as the wee, but not very fast. Its a kinetic energy ratio thing.
One must have to have quite a Johnson to get into the (mens) space program.
June 8, 2008 at 1:57 am
“Daddy LOOK! A Meteor shower!”
“-Not this time son, that was just the space station discharging it’s bilge.”
“You mean that I just made a wish on a flaming piece of turd?”
“That you did son.”
June 8, 2008 at 5:18 am
Yep. Meteors sometimes leave streaks in clothing, too.