Check this out, boys and girls! I stole copied this excerpted heavily from an article over at Science Daily – where their noggins are like Swiss cheese in my putty-stained hands.
Ali Vanderveld, a post-doctoral cosmologist at JPL with very nice teeth, smiles indulgently at the Science Daily journalist and pats him on the head when told by him that “space is really big – even bigger than my Uncle Dooby’s belly!”
ScienceDaily (Dec. 28, 2008) — About 10 years ago, scientists reached the astonishing conclusion that our universe is accelerating apart at ever-increasing speeds, stretching space and time itself like melted cheese. Or even unmelted but really really soft cheese, like what you get in a cheese ball over the holidays. The force that’s pushing the universe apart is still a mystery, which is precisely why it was originally dubbed “Fred”, but is now known as “dark energy.”
But is dark energy really real? Is our universe really accelerating? These questions hang around in the mind of Ali Vanderveld, a post-doctoral cosmologist at JPL, like an adolescent air biscuit – potent and long-lasting. Vanderveld and her colleagues recently published a paper in the journal Physical Review looking at how giant holes in our “Swiss-cheese-like” universe might make space look as if it’s accelerating when it’s really not. Each of them got a gold star on their next paycheck, and a coupon for a free Wendy’s Cheeseburger.
They concluded these holes, or voids, are not sufficient to explain away dark energy; so drugs have got to be involved. Nevertheless, Vanderveld says it’s important to continue to question fundamental traits of the very space we live in. “I mean, everyone’s gotta live somewhere, so you might as well get to know the space you’re in.”
“Sometimes we take dark energy for granted,” said Vanderveld, “And it can occasionally get pissy.” “But there are other theories that could explain why the universe appears to be moving apart at faster and faster speeds. It could just be lost and in a big hurry.”
What this babe figgered out is that – by golly – dark energy has been hiding inside swiss cheese. In the holes, where its nice and dark, if you can believe it!
So the next time the Red Cross comes calling, give generously.
In a related but completed different article – but still written by our heroic journalists – I give you this!
This was from a wonderful article I didn’t read. Science Daily changed the location of the puppy before I could bookmark it, so all I have to offer is a cool illustration.
It obviously means something complex – and no-doubt having something to do with Science! – but I have failed to fathom it’s inner meaning after almost no effort whatsoever.
These are all the teeth I have. I have got to teeth-surf some more, soon.
If my post makes even less sense than usual, it’s because I’m short about a week’s sleep. Insomnia and muscle/joint pain is kicking my ass this past week, so please forgive my inattentiveness.
