Someday

When I was younger, I never wanted to have a child. The thought of me being responsible for the well being of a small creature completely and utterly reliant upon me for life and sustenance frightened me, especially given my fondness for the fun life. Plus, how could a loser like me relate to a toddler? My wife’s sisters’ children all were afraid of me, so what about one who was with me all the time?

But, all of that left me when I first was able to hold my daughter seven and a half years ago. This moment was not at the hospital, for her first days were spent separated from us due to complications, but rather on my couch back at home, in the middle of the night, away from the nurses and well wishers, watching some stupid fucking show on ESPN, just because nothing else was on worth a flying fuck at the time. At that moment, I looked down and saw my daughter, sleeping the sleep of the angels on my lap. I saw me looking back, and a strange feeling came over me at OFuckThirty in the morning. A new feeling, one I never encountered before.

Now, I was too fucking tired to completely comprehend what was going on, but as the days wore on, the old protectiveness I used to display on the baseball diamond or in the barroom came through, though this time, it was not throwing a beanball at some dickhead who had just bowled over my shortstop a few innings ago or helping to even the odds with my friends as a rival fraternity closed in on our turf. No, this was a different protectiveness. This was protecting the future, as cliched as that sounds. This was not only making certain she was physically safe (and woe to any boy who thinks that in a couple of years he can get fresh with her. Just sayin’), but also making certain she had the same opportunities and chances as my parents labored to secure for me as the inevitable “letting go” moments start piling up. This is making certain she is able to succeed and prosper. This is making certain that she will be able to do all of this, despite the obstacles in her way. I mean, she’s my daughter, so a little bullshit on the path should mean nothing.

But what of the future? What does it hold? Debt? Shitty job prospects? Reduced opportunities to achieve and prosper? Reduced health care? Threats from rising powers who seek to displace the US as the global hegemon who can guarantee and protect freedom and capitalism? Derision at home from those who seek to sneer at the people who work to pay the taxes that fund their consequence free lifestyles? That is what my daughter faces?

When she sleeps, I sometimes still look in on her and watch her for a minute. I watch her dream her dreams of rising ponies and eating ice cream by the bathtub, as she describes it. And I realize that someday, she will leave this house and go out on her own. Someday, she will face the obstacles I listed above, and I will be unable to help her. Someday, I will have to let her go, and this someday frightens me. It frightens me to think of what she will face. And it frightens me to think that I will be unable to stop what will confront her.

But I can. I can protect her someday by doing some things she still cannot do. I can protect her someday by voting to determine the future of this country and the accompanying risks. I can protect her someday by doing my damnedest to remove from office via the franchise those who wish to restrict her future. To my daughter, all I can promise her is that I will do everything I legally can do to help her someday be as carefree as her today.All I can do is promise her that I will never let her down. All I can promise her is that I will never allow those who wish to doom her go untouched.

And to those who wish to restrict her someday, I have a few words for you as well.

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Flyerfuck you forever and a fucking day with the fuckwang from the flying fuckbeagle of freedom. Fuck you for thinking you can restrict my daughter’s future without a fight. Fuck you for fucking thinking you could sneer at us without me fucksmacking that sneer off of your fucking fuckmangled faces. Fuck you for thinking you could impose your will without us fucking kicking you in your fucking nutsacks along the way. And fuck you for general purpose because I fucking hate seeing the future fucked over by a bunch of skinny jeans wearing fucksticks.

You think you can go untouched and damage my daughter’s future? Discofuck you with a syringe.

You think you can dampen her chances for a better tomorrow? Rotofuck you up your wellfucked fuckhole with the fucking fuckstick of the future.

You think we won’t go down without a fight? Equinefuck you with a horse’s fuckcock.

No, fucking fuckmonkeys of failure, we will not stand idly by and let you fuck over the country’s future. We will fucking not let you fucking get way with turning us into a socialist fuckhole without a fight. And we fucking the fuckdonkey in the back of the fucktruck will not let you get away with it so long as we can vote your fucking asses out.

I have no idea what will happen Tuesday, but I fucking guarantee that I will not let my daughter’s future be squandered, so long as I have something to say or do about it. I owe it to her, and I owe it to you.

So fucking go out and vote. Fuck the statists in their fucked over fuckholes and teach them it won’t happen anymore.

Thank you, and fuck the left.

The Heartland Institute Doesn’t Mess Around

Just ask these fools.

Oh, and to those who did the deed:

Fuck you, legal style.

Slippery Slope and Whatnot

Could you imagine the bullshit that would be unleashed if attempts to use the court to force bloggers to out themselves?

Fuck that shit. Furyfuck it anonymously with the Founding Fathers’ fecund fuckstick of freedom. Fuck it for trying to use the courts to inflict harm on a person because of a disagreement. Fuck it for fucking over traditions that go back to the Revolution where anonymous posters and pamphleteers spread their ideas. And fuck it because the thought of how low lefties will stoop never ceases to amaze me.

Ugh. Is this medicine we should be taking?

Nominating Mitt Romney is sort of like taking Grandma’s castor oil. Republicans are dreading the thought of downing their unpleasant-tasting medicine but worry that sooner or later they will have to.

I ask you: now that the choices seem to be Castor Oil (hell of an endorsement there!) or Gingrich, is drinking heavily the best choice at the moment?

An Open Letter to the MSM

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you until you feel simultaneous shame and a lice ringed exploded fuckhole from the scabies soaked reality you try to mold in favor of your Occupy Crowd. Fuck you for not reporting on a sex crime for ten days, probably because it involved your fellow political travelers. Fuck you for either being incompetent and missing this crime for ten days, or malicious in your attempts to spike it. Fuck you for joining Penn State and the US Catholic Bishops in running cover for sex criminals by not reporting this story immediately. And fuck you, simply because your malicious incmpetence needs to be called out and exposed.

Occupy DC Scum Treat Old Ladies Like They Do Soap

Thanks to Stephen G.

Oh, and zipperfuck with a carwash hose the OWS scum up their stinky, lice riddled fuckorifices for what they did, what they do, and what they want to do.

Remember When The TeaParty Was A Rape-y?

I guess this is what Sheriff Joe was warning us about.

Yeah, fuck you, lefties. Fuck your stupidity until it asssumes sentience for imputing upon us what you do every day. Go to hell, and face the revenge fuckmonster along the way for what you are doing.